George Zimmerman and George Zimmer Sue Each Other Over Name

images-5by Karen Topakian

Former criminal defendant and slayer of Trayvon Martin, George Zimmerman, filed a lawsuit in Federal Court against Men’s Wearhouse founder and former CEO, George Zimmer, demanding he change his name. Mr. Zimmerman alleges that the similarity in names could tarnish his image as a law and order icon.

“I just spent the last 18 months defending my right to take the life of an unarmed teenager and now people think I also sell men’s suits,” said Zimmerman. “When will the injustice end?”

Mr. Zimmer appeared in Federal court counter-suing demanding that Mr. Zimmerman change his name, instead.

“I just spent the last 40 years helping men improve their style of dress and appearance and now people think I’m guilty of shooting a young man just because he was wearing a hoodie,” said Mr. Zimmer wearing a European cut narrow lapel navy pin-striped suit. “If I had seen Mr. Martin on the street, I wouldn’t have drawn a gun, I would have suggested he sport a rust colored windbreaker, a pair of slim cut cargo pants and navy suede Hush Puppy moccasins.”

Mr. Zimmer and Mr. Zimmerman met for the first time in court.

Mr. Zimmerman learned of Mr. Zimmer when he Googled himself and instead read about Mr. Zimmer whose job loss earned him many news articles.

“I started the habit of Googling myself to see if I received credit on the police website for reporting the presence of ‘those people’ in my neighborhood.,” said Mr. Zimmerman. “When articles about George Zimmer showed up, I thought who the heck is this chump using my name, then I figured out they weren’t talking about me. That’s when I decided to force him to change his name.”

Mr. Zimmer learned about Mr. Zimmerman when the national press reported on his arrest.

“I may have made a killing in the men’s clothing business, but I’m not a killer,” said Mr. Zimmer who was shocked when he heard from the court. “Out of the blue, I received a suit in the mail.”

Mr. Zimmerman questioned the former CEO’s character. “What kind of a man takes a firing from his own company laying down? Why didn’t he fire back?” asked Mr. Zimmerman who assured Mr. Zimmer that he should watch whom he is dealing with. “I could get away with murder.”

During a brief court recess, Mr. Zimmer offered a few fashion tips to the heavyset Mr. Zimmerman, “Stick with the two button jacket, it gives you a longer leaner look. Do yourself a favor, stay away from double-breasted.”

The judge hearing the case ordered mediation for the two men, urging them to find common ground rather than stand their ground.

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